Surviving the 4th Trimester | A Lesson in Grace

surviving the 4th trimester

Grace. The exercise of love, kindness, mercy, and favor.


If you take anything from this post, let it be the very first words you read.


Grace for your baby. Grace for your partner. Grace for your family.

But most importantly – grace for yourself.

The 4th trimester can be a really trying time.

There are moments when you’re flying high on pure baby bliss.

And other moments you wonder how you’ll ever make it through. Moments when you simply have to take it day by day, or heck even hour by hour.

But you can make it. It does get better.

Soon you’ll notice the moments of baby bliss outweigh the moments that aren’t so much.

I’m living proof of that right now.

Mason is officially 3 months, and more often than not I feel as if I’ve got this mommy thing down.


Of course there are still days when he’ll throw me for a loop.

Just earlier this week he decided he wouldn’t sleep unless my boob was permanently attached to his mouth. 🤱🏾

And I had to give us both a chockfull of grace.

Something very hard to do at 4am after having little to no sleep with a baby screaming in your face.



For those of you reading this and thinking – wait, what? There’s a 4th trimester?


It’s the first 3 months after you’ve given birth to your bundle of joy. It’s a time of adjustment. And surprisingly wasn’t mentioned much in books or any classes I took.

I was only aware of it due to a good friend who recently had a little one herself and warned me how hard the first 3 months would be.

And she didn’t lie – it’s been a tough time.

Don’t get me wrong, Mason is amazing and I’m pretty sure we’ve had it easier than most when it comes to newborns.

But there was still a steep learning curve {one I feel I’ll continue to climb throughout Mason’s life}.

And that’s essentially what the 4th trimester is – a learning period, an adjustment period, a healing period.


Learning for you on how to care for your new addition.

An adjustment for baby as he/she becomes accustomed to the outside world.

Healing for you both because pregnancy, labor, and delivery is WORK that takes a toll on both you and baby.

So how do you survive such a vulnerable time where your hormones are driving you mad, your body feels turned inside out, and you have the weight of being responsible for a tiny human on your shoulders?

Well, I could give you a list of things to try for your baby to help him/her feel more comfortable in the world and make you feel more at ease in caring for them.

Things like swaddling, skin-to-skin, baby-wearing, and white noise machines.

But before you get to any of that, I believe the #1 thing you need to survive the 4th trimester is to practice grace.


Because no matter what tricks of the trade you try, you’re going to make mistakes. You’re going to get frustrated. You’re going to want to curl in a ball and cry. You’re going to wonder why everyone else seems to know what they’re doing. You’re going to feel super insecure and question your ability to be a mom.

And no amount of swaddling or baby wearing will change that.

Which is why I’ve come to believe that giving yourself and your baby tons of grace during this period is essential for survival.

Everyone goes through the same period of fear and doubt – whether it’s your first child or your fourth.

Know that there are brighter days ahead.

And at the very least, when you feel you’re at your wit’s end, remember this:


surviving the 4th trimester

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